In Sickness and in Health

- Season 4

(1989)

Alf has had his hip operation and Winston has moved out,replaced by his straight cousin Pele. However some things never change,such as Alf's continuing feud with Mrs Hollingbery,particularly as she hogs his television. Things could be about to change,though,as Arthur points out to Alf that he could be a very rich man by marrying the widow and he sets about wooing her.

Encouraged by Arthur Alf continues to pursue Mrs Hollingbery,even going down on one knee to propose though she wants time to think. After a night in the pub a surprise engagement party is thrown for the still - undecided - couple but when Mrs Hollingbery learns that,as a husband and wife, they could buy the house for twenty thousand pounds when its market value is five times that she is quick to accept.

Alf prepares a lavish meal for Arthur who has just come up with eight score draws on the football pools. Unfortunately he has won nothing as his stupid wife failed to post the coupon. There is further despondency as Alf realises he may be too old to acquire a mortgage to buy the house and the idea of his adopting Pele,who'll get it for him,does not appeal. Fortunately salvation arrives when Mrs Hollingbery gets a letter from her brother in Australia,who is happy to buy the house for her - providing that he meets and approves of the groom-to-be.

It's the eve of Alf and Mrs Hollingbery's trip down under - taking Arthur for company. In the pub the Johnsons have one of their increasingly public rows and Alf is not cheered when everybody places a book on whether the plane will crash. Back home he gets into an argument about noise with just about everybody before admitting to himself that he would really rather not go to Australia.

On the flight to Australia Arthur,Alf and Mrs Hollingbery are nervous passengers though Alf's argument with a steward who forbids him to smoke breaks the monotony. On arrival Alf argues with a man who turns out to be Mrs H's brother Ricky but,back at his house,he bonds with Alf over their shared racism. Neither Alf nor Mrs Hollingbery are happy when they are given a double room and Ricky gets the wrong idea when Alf says he wants to room with Arthur.

The three visitors have a day sight-seeing,starting in a cafe where Alf defends Hitler. After Alf has rowed with a lazy lifeguard over a non-existent drowning victim,the trio take a boat trip and Alf soon discovers that he and his bride-to-be hold differing views on many things. As far as Alf is concerned,one thing is for sure though. Australians are descended from convicts and they are still not to be trusted.

The sight-seeing continues with Alf having a confrontation with a crocodile and some Aboriginals,who nonetheless get the better of him after he tries to patronise them. Back at Ricky's Alf gets a business proposition from Ricky and his partner Mooney but it is apparent that they have misunderstood Alf's financial position and soon the three Brits are on the plane back home.

Facing another Christmas with a frugal dinner Alf cons the vicar into giving him a Christmas hamper but Mrs Hollingbery refuses to accept it because it has been dishonestly obtained. So Alf takes it to the pub to raffle, making sure that most of the slips of paper with the winning name on bear his. However he is outwitted at the last minute by the equally devious Bert Luscombe.