Married to the Kellys

- Season 1

(2003)

Tom Warner, a young, bright but somewhat lazy New York author who just tasted success with one bestselling book, gives in to his wife's homesick pleading: they move to her native Kansas, close to her parent's home. Soon the big city individualist finds his anonymous life is turned upside down as they spend more time at his in-laws' (her parents, siblings and others) and obligatory local community events then in their own home or alone, and the old-fashioned social pressure is quite alarming for a Big Apple-free spirit.

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Susan is sick and tired of hearing her sister Mary's husband Chris is so perfect, in fact slavishly house-trained, while her unemployed Tom is very inventive in finding ways and reasons to get out of any chores. So Tom decides to get the inconvenient 'good example' Chris to become less helpful and spend some time drinking. It works like a charm, but to Tom's horror Mary finds Chris being in the dog house makes him sexy, so he stops helping out and the Kelly parents expect him to take over...

Tom finds an obnoxious customer in the deli is a fellow New Yorker married into Kansas, Bob Lydecker, and even Susan is actually delighted to have another city couple to double date with - till she meets them and thus finds out Bobs local wife is actually Trish Arnold, who was in high-school with her, and tore up Mary's school presidential campaign posters, leading to a fight for which Susan was suspended, her most heroic youth-deed. Still her attempt to lay a guilt-trip on him doesn't stop Tom from accepting Bobs invitation to go to his company's VIP-box in the ...

Tom learns he's not the only one wrestling with the must-status of countless traditions. Everyone pretends to like Sandy's ham balls family recipe, but even Susan would eat anything at home to get rid of the taste. As always it's worse for Chris- Mary isn't content to drag him to the annual Lithuanian folk-dance, because of her rivalry with Bonnie McClintock she's determined to erase the memory of his one step wrong last year by winning flat out. Tom worries he has nothing to talk about with dad Bill, so he's eager to fill in for Chris at Bill's office's softball team...

Susan assures Tom he shouldn't feel manipulated by her family just because every choice he makes seems to make them jump to conclusions, e.g. after he didn't eat a whole giant T-bone, mother Kelly makes chicken 'because Tom doesn't like steak'. When they decide to buy a new car, everyone has suggestions, but Susan tells Tom to make his own choice. Once they bring the car they both like home, everyone inspects it, except Lewis whose only question about any car is whether he fits in the trunk. However mother quickly jumps to an exceptionally serious conclusion: Tom ...

When Lewis picks up Toms mail and opens some, it's obvious even to him Tom still has his New York apartment, but agrees not to tell; however when Lewis takes off to it just before Thanksgiving, the family soon finds out and get him back. Tom invites him over for a 'vacation' on his couch, but gets anxiety attacks after Susans wining about him needing psychological backup and not wanting to live in Kansas made him cancel his lease. Lewis tries to cheer him up by visiting 'awesome' Kansas spots such as the Worlds Largest Barn, but it only makes Lewis happy as he finally...

As each year, Mary makes Chris' official birthday presents list- and as Tom suspects, leaves out the best gifts for herself, so he ignores the list and gives a more original gift. At the party, Toms New York stories are a great success, but when he adds to the way he got his scar that Susan has a tattoo at the same spot, that proves to be one of Susan's best-kept secrets, especially shocking to her mother. The tempting idea of coming clean with the truth tricks several other Kellys into confessions the are soon made to regret...

Christmas at the Kellys' is a communal series of traditions, so half-Jewish Tom can forget about anything of his own, even watching 'A Carol Christmas' on TV at home. The family is devoted, with a budget doubled since last year, to finally making the local top ten of Christmas-decorated homes, and since mother Sandy is down on the first Chistmas after her ma's death, Mary takes charge in penal camp drill style of operation take over every single imaginable task, while Lewis concentrates on straying the stall figures in the wackiest places. When they're finally all off...

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When Tom decides to have a room fit for him to write and be himself in, Susan decides to give the job to Mike Evans, a locally very popular former class mate, once believed the most promising of his year - unfortunately he turns out to be the worst in the business, not even licensed... This episode's plot has a few more surprising twists.

When Tom consults the young doctor Jim Coglan, he's a little worried how eagerly he's told to drop trou and gripped in his intimate region, but when the MD calls at the Kelly house, being another local acquaintance, it soon turns out he took his fiancée Trudy only as the best available copy of Susan, apparently his only love, and even dumps Trudy 'for her' on the spot - yet Tom soon discovers his intentions are even more twisted but innocent...

Susan spends too much time and (his) money at the mall for Tom's taste, so he puts it she has way too much spare time- to his surprise she decides to look for a job. For Lewis' twenty-first birthday the Kellys plan the usual kids party in the pizzeria; Mary has coined and even registered the term 'twenty-fun'. Tom convinces Chris that even Lewis must be ready for a more manly celebration at 21, so they first plan a (more frat style?) evening at a bar. Mary is green with envy when Susan lands the only job she was ever fired from: hostess; it's at Mario's restaurant, so...

When Tom finally finds an old male friend in Kansas, and they talk sports and other guy stuff in a bar all night instead of the Kelly's stuff such as food, Susan gets enough of a taste of his conversational boredom to realize he needs a friend, but in order for her not be left out they figure the only solution is to match up Bob with one of her female friends so they can go out as two couples. Mary and Chris host a fancy dress-up 'Oscar night' by the TV, but Sandy is worried when Lewis finds money in his tuxedo which he thinks someone gave him as a present at Marys ...

As Tom is quite happy constantly bickering with Susan like lovers only allow each-other, he secretively encourages his docile brother-in-law Chris to stand his ground for once against his ever bossy wife Mary, but in that couple it soon leads to the first-ever break-up lasting over three hours, just when the Kelly parents plan a 'perfect' dinner for the first girl-friend that Lewis might even seem a wedding option for. Meanwhile Mary stays at their place, and overcomes Tom initial aversion by showing how much better she's at housework then either he or Susan even knew...

Tom Wagner is delighted to hear he may finally write an article for a paper in his native New York, but as the Kellys find out they not only expect him to mention them, but Mary arranges -behind his back- an interview for him on a popular radio talk show; as the presenter is a frustrated would-be author, he tricks Tom into insulting all Kansas so the whole family is shunned, just when dad hoped to become treasurer of his club. Meanwhile 'baby brother' Lewis is told by ma, being a major now he should start buying things himself, but rather tricks Susan into doing it ...

When Susan and Mary's younger sister Lisa returns home from classes in London, she is welcomed as the 'baby girl', but Tom soon finds out she has grown up and wants to accept an invitation to join friends on a site-seeing trip trough Euripe and study art history, not nursing nor commuting with the car her parents have ready for her. Chris warns him in-laws like them have no real vote in family affairs, but Tom tries to enlist everyone to encourage Lisa to stand up for her dream against their parents' expectations.

Tom and Susan ponder what to do with his tax refund. Lewis's sleeping is so excessive even his parents feel it's time to force him to get active by charging rent- he immediately announces to move out; when ma puts dad in the doghouse for the idea, Lewis decides to milk him big-time for accepting to stay. Chris waited a month before telling Mary her master-plan for their entire lives is down the drain because he lost his job; Mary is a raging wreck for days. Susan starts her own plan and economizing. Tom convinces Chris to admit he doesn't want to stay in computers, ...

When Toms symbol is eliminated from the dog house system for being the only repeat offender ever, he decides to ingratiate himself again. First he agrees to loan Chris $10,000 for his first house fix&re-sale project, but when Susan accepts Mary's condition not to tell the family, he needs an alternative and decides to pretend he's accepting to ghost-write sports hero Tony Gonzalez' book just to impress everyone. Chris is delighted to be the boss for once, but soon finds the family volunteers completely ignore his precise instructions. Toms plan B tumbles down as his ...

At his retirement party, Tom's pa state it's about time for Tom to move back to New York now he's been offered a job and a relation's prestigious flat is about to be available, but Susan decides to convince them that is unnecessary by inviting -well, ordering- them to attend her parents' wedding anniversary which is held in 'Horace', the house Chris has bought and fixed up but is emotionally not ready to part with. As Lewis doesn't now how to tell his parents he wants to move in with his girlfriend, he just moves out the content of his room piece by piece. Yet Tom is ...